The first step propelled me
into an assemblage
of misty columns,
terrifying bone-white vapors,
and sadistically whining
The next step was a leap
into an arid sandy valley
where the brutish winds
set spiders twitching
and rattlers hiding
beneath the moldy thistle.
I stepped into an ocean
commanded by microseismic eruptions
and prosaic waves converted
into hyperactive disruptive
mudslides of the continental shelves.
In vain, I did attempt to step
back into civilization
whence overwhelming fright
nullified my ability
to untie the laces
and remove those shoes.
A quicky Sunday morning write up (again, instead of writing my screenplay) for
dversepoets “Poetics – On your feet.”
Brian Miller challenged the poets to write a poem with shoes as the inspiration.
Also posted on:
Poetry Picnic Week 29: Art, Music, and Poetry By Kavita and Olivia
Where did I get the images? I’ll admit. Yesterday, along with the local ARES (Amateur Radio Emergency Service) I was present for a briefing by a NOAA scientist He was trying to recruit volunteer weather watchers. Did I sign up to volunteer as a storm watcher? Those of you who know me, can guess, with confidence.
Oh, yeah…if you couldn’t guess, this is a metaphor for taking control of your own life, psychological state of being, and all that mental health theory.
Very imaginative! Great imagry..and that twist at the end was a delightful surprise if I’m correct…afraid of civilization? Or was it the preceding experience? Could be taken both ways. Command of language is impressive. Good job!
This is highly imaginative..interesting imagry, and I particularly liked the ending which, to me, can be taken two ways…afraid of what you experienced, or afraid of returning to civilization…Good job!
Very imaginative scenario here, with good control of language and interesting imagry. I liked the ending, in particular. Good job!
Very imaginative! Good control of language and interesting imagry. I liked the ending too. Good job!
The last stanza is a metaphor: escape yet when returning to reality we are hogtied. The regime we exist under does that to people. Have you tried http://s4.zetaboards.com/Firebrand/index OR http://www.madswirl.com ? I write under dellmyth on those sites and lickspit on twitter. And ttruk on WordPress and http://www.flickr.com/photos/dellmyth
Yes, the regime does that. But we also do it to ourselves.
bet those would not be easy to walk in…love that last stanza and the depth hidden within…so true…
I need some of those shoes to scape the horrible civilization we live in! I need them ASAP!
Good stuff. Truly inspiring.
great! i need a pair of those,to escape…
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This is the right blog for anyone who wants to find out about this topic. You realize so much its almost hard to argue with you (not that I actually would want…HaHa). You definitely put a new spin on a topic thats been written about for years. Great stuff, just great!
🙂 simply prosaic to the nth power! 🙂
Enjoy gooseberry day!
hoho! what a lovely! here’s my entry: http://fiveloaf.wordpress.com/2011/08/30/a-roar-to-mankind/
I love it! The picture of the shoes sets the imagination to bounding, then your words paint a picture of you flying throught the air–arms flailing–landing in far off places. Nice one!
My entry: http://charleslmashburn.wordpress.com/2011/09/04/blood-on-the-moon-2/
Love your shoes and we should all have some lying around so we can escape here and there and then come back to where we belong again
Wow, take a walk in my shoes, huh? Great poem. Blessings, Terri
My son has wanted shoess like that his whole life!