what’s a zongrik?

what’s a zongrik

My Logo If I had a Production Company

Often people ask me what’s a zongrik? Since’s today’s poetry challenge was to write a haiku and villanelle (or other poem) about our blog name, I will have to explain what zongrik means, or you won’t understand why I wrote what I wrote. One day, my kids and their Dad came home from Vegas with an Excalibur Viking Cap.

Viking Hat

The horns come off: you just push them out, and they are hollow. When I had that phallic thing in my hand, I realized that it would be cool to be able to pee while standing. I tried to think of a name for a device shaped like that; a device a woman could carry around and use while hiking, to pee while standing, for women fighter pilots, who can’t get out of the seat while flying, and other such activities.

I started thinking. The first word that came to mind was “dick.” Then I thought of the opera singers who are rather zaftig. They might wear a costume cap like such as this while singing a Wagner Aria. So the input command was “zaftig, dick….zaftig dick” and the output idea ended up being “zongrik.”

every woman should posses a zongrik

(a zongrik villanelle)

women! you should all posses a zongrik!
don’t stand or crouch. stand up and take control.
before it’s too late, you whip it out quick.

it has a cool case. what a snappy trick.
if troublesome squatting is not your goal,
go ahead! dare to possess a zongrik.

when you sit, you might get stuck with a tick ―
in your fanny or maybe in your hole.
before it’s too late, you whip it out quick;

since unveiling your rear, is a big schtick,
be a female who takes an active role.
women, you should own more than one zongrik.

if your man teases, give him a swift kick.
his male asset should not perturb your soul.
before it’s too late, you whip it out quick:

he might stop calling you nicknames like “chick,”
and insult you since you don’t have a pole.
every woman should posses a zongrik.
before it’s too late, you whip it out quick.

a zongrik senryu

stand to pee device
ready for a bathroom break
don’t leave your zongrik


Written for:

February 29th – Theme or Word: Journey

First image: Graphics by  Bat-Ami Gordin  © 2012 all rights reserved. Credit if you use it, please.

Photo Credit: Party Times r Us

About zongrik

For those of you who do not know the handle "zongrik," that would be Bat-Ami Gordin. Most people call me "Tammy." Bat-Ami means "daughter of my nation" in Hebrew. It's a heavy name to carry around. I answer to either name. I also answer to "mama." Some Basic Things about me: Animal lover, mom, poet/writer, dramatic soprano, photographer, teacher/tutor, CERT/Technician and, oh yeah, aerospace engineer. I consider myself "The Astro-Poet." To learn more about the origins of the word "zongrik" see whats-a-zongrik?

Posted on February 28, 2012, in The Haiku Challenge and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 25 Comments.

  1. Very funny…. But practical…

  2. LOL….I never knew this…but still I prefer sitting down, thanks. 🙂

  3. Absolutely wonderful…you have such a depth to you talent…this is a real winner in
    it’s own category … humor that speaks the truth. sigh. but LoL.
    Love it.
    Siggi in Downeast Maine

  4. This was quite surprising, and alarming! Unexpected! Creative! Empowering! Whoa! K.

  5. Call me old-fashion, I would still prefer sitting down. He He!

  6. Phew, you’ve really thought about this, great candid post!

  7. This is wonderful!! I laughed well and good. Thank you for your gift of humour and wit. This challenge has been a great trip. Thank you so much.

  8. Love it. Creative way to come up with a blog name. Plus impowering females. 🙂

  9. magicalmysticalteacher

    Hilarious! Absolutely hilarious! 🙂

    Journey with My Muse

  10. Wonderfully done Zongrik. This is really something that brought a smile on my face. Didn’t know that.
    Thanks for being part of the haiku Journey of Few Miles.

    • no one really knows what zongrik means, just my kids and a few close friends. people ask me all the time, but it takes soooo long to explain. now i have a place to direct them if they “need to know”

  11. I loved it! 🙂 Zongrik! You’ve got a patent here, Zongrik!

  12. Someone is Special

    I loved it.. Great Zongrik.. Happy to have you in the challenge.. SmileS…

    Someone is Special

  13. LOL … inquiring minds no longer need to ponder!!! Delightful!

  14. lol too too funny. Love the creative blending exercise you used to come up with the name, very creative. Fun write. Thanks

  15. May it become a million-seller – especially in lands where ticks are plentiful and lavatories few 🙂

  16. Bwa ha ha! At last someone is thinking. Love both the villanelle and the senyru. I’ll never be able to look at your blog name again without laughing.

  17. OH,this was just great!so much information there too.:)~

  18. After years of practice, I’ve gotten quite skilled at the squatting stance and don’t need a zongrik. Besides, wouldn’t you have to clean it after each use? Drip drying in the purse could be kinda gross.


  19. Well, I’m thinking…ESPECIALLY all those women fighter pilots! WOW! Govt would pay $1,719 for each zongrik, and women would be FILLING those cockpits–or do they call them something else, when a woman is flying in it?

    SORRY! Just cold NOT help myself…it was the devil himself/herself doing the writing here!
    PEACE and LIGHT!

  20. Too funny! Many people insist that women can pee standing up!

  21. The question is always, what to do with it after you finish….

  22. I don’t have one of those.

  1. Pingback: encore presentation: 2012 featured poets ~ zongrik | my heart's love songs

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